سرنوشت خود مشخص خواهد کرد

Destiny will now reveal itself

During a momentous battle, a Japanese general decided to attack even though his army was greatly outnumbered. He was confident they would win, but his men were filled with doubt.

On the way to the battle, they stopped at a religious shrine. After praying with the men, the general took out a coin and said, "I shall now toss this coin. If it is heads, we shall win. If it is tails we shall lose."

"Destiny will now reveal itself."

He threw the coin into the air and all watched intently as it landed. It was heads. The soldiers were so overjoyed and filled with confidence that they vigorously attacked the enemy and were victorious.

After the battle. A lieutenant remarked to the general, "No one can change destiny."

"Quite right," the general replied as he showed the lieutenant the coin, which had heads on both sides.

E-mail to wife

E-mail to wife

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address and without realizing his error he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile….Somewhere in Houston a widow had just returned from her husband’s funeral. The widow decided to check her e-mail expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message she fainted. The widow’s son rushed into the room found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife

Subject: I’ve reached

Date: 2 May 2006

I know you’re surprised to hear from me. They have computers here and we are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones. I’ve just reached and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you TOMORROW!

Your loving hubby.

 

کلوپ های لندن

London's clubs

There were a lot of men's clubs in London a few years ago. Men went there and read their newspapers quietly, or drank or had meals with their friends.

All of these men's clubs had a lot of very good servants. At every club one of the servants was a doorman. Mr. Grace was the doorman of one of these clubs. He was fifty-five years old, and he had grey hair and a big grey moustache.

The telephone rang in his office at six o'clock in the evening, and a woman spoke to him. She said, 'Are you the doorman of the George Club?'

'Yes, I am,' Mr. Grace answered.

'Please give my husband a message,' the woman said.

'Your husband isn't at the club this evening,' Mr. Grace answered.

'But I haven't told you his name!' the woman said angrily.

'That isn't necessary,' Mr. Grace answered. 'No husband is ever at the club.

 

داستان کوهستان

Mountain Story

"A son and his father were walking on the mountains. Suddenly, his son falls, hurts himself and screams: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"

To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating, somewhere in the mountain: "AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" Curious, he yells: "Who are you?"

He receives the answer: "Who are you?" And then he screams to the mountain: "I admire you!" The voice answers: "I admire you!"

Angered at the response, he screams: "Coward!"

He receives the answer: "Coward!" He looks to his father and asks: "What's going on?"

The father smiles and says: "My son, pay attention." Again the man screams: "You are a champion!" The voice answers: "You are a champion!" The boy is surprised, but does not understand.

Then the father explains: "People call this ECHO, but really this is LIFE. It gives you back everything you say or do.

Our life is simply a reflection of our actions. If you want more love in the world, create more love in your heart. If you want more competence in your team, improve your competence.

This relationship applies to everything, in all aspects of life; Life will give you back everything you have given to it.

" YOUR LIFE IS NOT A COINCIDENCE. IT'S A REFLECTION OF YOU!"

 

خانم گرین

Mrs. Green

Mrs. Green was eighty, but she had a small car she always drove to the shops in it on Saturday and bought her food.

She did not drive fast, because she was old, but she drove well and never hit anything. Sometimes her grandchildren said to her, 'Please don't drive your car, Grandmother. We can take you to the shops.'

But she always said, 'No, I like driving. I've drive in for fifty years, and I'm not going to stop now.'

Last Saturday she stopped her car at some traffic-lights because they were red, and then it did not start again. The lights were green, then yellow, then red, then green again, but her car did not start.

'What am I going to do now?' she said.

But then a policeman came and said to her kindly, 'Good morning. Don't you like any of our colors today?'

خانم گرین

خانم گرین هشتاد سالش بود، اما ماشین کوچکی داشت و همیشه با آن در روزهای شنبه برای خرید غذایش به فروشگاه می‌رفت.

او به علت پیری سریع رانندگی نمی‌کرد، اما خوب رانندگی می‌کرد و هیچوقت با چیزی برخورد(تصادف)نمیکرد.. بعضی وقت‌ها نوه‌هایش به او می‌گفتند: مادربزرگ، لطفا رانندگی نکنید، ما می توانیم تو را به فروشگاه ببریم.

اما همیشه می‌گفت: نه، من رانندگی را دوست دارم. پنجاه سال رانندگی کردم، حالا قصد ندارم از رانندگی دست بردارم.

شنبه‌ی گذشته ماشینش را پشت چراغ قرمز متوقف کرد، و حرکت نکرد. چراغ سبز، سپس زرد، سپس قرمز و دوباره سبز شد، اما حرکت نکرد

با خود گفت: حالا باید چی کار کنم؟

اما در آن هنگام پلیسی آمد و با مهربانی به او گفت: صبح بخیر، شما هیچ کدام از رنگ‌های چراغ راهنمایی ما رو دوست ندارید

آزمون خیلی سخت

Difficult Essay Exam

One day a student was taking a very difficult essay exam. At the end of the test, the prof asked all the students to put their pencils down and immediately hand in their tests. The young man kept writing furiously, although he was warned that if he did not stop immediately he would be disqualified. He ignored the warning, finished the test. Minutes later, and went to hand the test to his instructor. The instructor told him he would not take the test.

The student asked, "Do you know who I am?"

The prof said, "No and I don't care."

The student asked again, "Are you sure you don't know who I am?"

The prof again said no. Therefore, the student walked over to the pile of tests, placed his in the middle, then threw the papers in the air "Good" the student said, and walked out. He passed.

آزمون خیلی سخت

روزی یک دانش‌آموز یک آزمون خیلی سخت داشت. در آخر امتحان، استاد از همه‌ی دانش‌آموزان خواست که قلم‌هایشان را پایین بگذارند و بلافاصله دست خود را در روی برگه خود بگذارند. مرد جوان با خشم به نوشتن ادامه داد، گو اینکه او مطلع بود که اگر او بلافاصله دست نگه ندارد او محروم خواهد شد. او اخطار را نادیده گرفت و امتحان را تمام کرد. دقایقی بعد، با برگه‌ی آزمون به سوی آموزگار خود رفت. آموزگار به او گفت که برگه امتحانی او را نخواهد گرفت.

دانش آموز پرسید: «می دانی من چه کسی هستم»

استاد گفت: «نه و اهمیتی نمیدم»

دانش آموز دوباره پرسید: «مطمئنی که مرا نمی شناسی؟»

استاد دوباره گفت نه. بنابراین دانش آموز رفت سمت برگه‌ها و برگه خودشو وسط اونا جا داد (جوری که استاد نمی‌تونست بفهمه که کدوم برگه اونه!) اونوقت [با خوشحالی] کاغذهایی که تو دستش بود رو به هوا پرت کرد و گفت: ایول! و رفت سمت بیرون.